The first six weeks

The first thing that hits you when you walk into an SCBU is the noise. Monitors beep every few seconds and the staff rush around looking after the babies (they generally look after 3 babies each and there were around 16 in this SCBU).
The one noise you will never hear in the SCBU is the sound of babies crying. 16 babies and not a peep. That's because most of the little mites are tucked away in incubators that are virtually sound proof. Its a surreal experience and I never want to hear the sound of a heart rate monitor again. Rahul and I can't bear the sound and if we ever hear it on TV we shudder.
Amelie had to stay in hospital for six weeks before we were allowed to take her home. This was incredibly draining for both Rahul and myself. Not only did we have to drive to the hospital everyday (an hour round trip) but we also had to watch her in her incubator. It was like being in a zoo. Horrible. As she grew stronger and the risk of infection passed we were able to take her out but it was such a faff. In the beginning we had to get a nurse to help as all her wires just got in the way. As we became more confident we were able to do it ourselves. We also got to change her nappy (the size of a dollies!) and feed her but this had to be done through the two holes in the side of the incubator. No mean feat sometimes! Amelie was fed through a tube for the first five weeks of her life. It was horrible. As she began to consume more milk the tube became more and more uncomfortable for her and often she would bring all the milk back up again. This would happen over and over again and it could take an hour to feed her 60mls of milk. Tiring when you are standing up, holding the feeding tube in your hand. I am also conviced that this is where her reflux started (more of that later).
As well as dealing with your own shock at having a baby in the SCBU you are also witness to other people's suffering. Some of the babies in the unit were smaller than Amelie and lots were seriously ill. You try not to look at other babies in the incubators and focus on your own but sometimes you would glance over and see a poor little mite on a respitator. It was really emotionally draining and I hope that all the babies who were in the unit are now home with the families. Again, we were so incredibly lucky that our little girl was just small.
After five weeks in an incubator Amelie was moved to a hospital closer to home and was taken out of the heated perspex box and put in a open cot (a perspex box without a lid!). This was a real trumph as it meant she was getting big enough to come home. A real milestone.